Monday, June 1, 2009

A Year Later

Dave kindly reminded me today that it is his 1 yr anniversary of being out of the Marine Corps. We celebrated it much like we did on the official separation day...with pizza and beer. It seems like a good night to reflect on the things we have learned and experienced in the last year during "life after the Corps." Many things are still the same and many things will never be the same again. I'm happy knowing I don't have to worry about him being gone for months on end in a war zone. I'm sad that he no longer gets to do what he loves. I'm hopeful he will find something new that he loves, but am not holding my breath at this point and am anticipating a long hard road ahead while he figures it out.

In the months following his EAS we discussed his going back so many times I told him we had to stop talking about it because the anxiety of indecision was driving me nuts. Finally in November we started the process of trying to go back to the Corps. Fast forward several months and we discover that it will be a no go. Headquarters Marine Corps decided he had too many tattoos for the Corps. (At first we thought it was a different reason, but last week we found out that was the real reason.) Wow. I find that a little crazy if you ask me, but I understand "uniform standards...blah blah blah." I still think it sucks, especially since almost half his tattoos are USMC related. The man tattoed an EGA (Eagle Globe and Anchor...or as Brody calls it the eagle and the world), Semper Fi, Fortitudine (the original USMC motto), a spartan punisher (the India Co mascot from 3/8 - woohoo welcome home 3/8), a ship to represent the 22 MEU, and a Marine pin up girl (very tastefully done btw). I think I may be forgetting one. Do you think he loves the Corps? Yeah, me too. I hate he can't go back. Some days I pray that God might see fit to have the USMC recall him. Forget the bonus money, just give him the active duty life back. I could go on a whole big long rant about my thoughts on the USMC tattoo policy...or rather the Commandant's policy...but I probably should just keep that to myself. It saddens me that I have a Marine ready and willing to go back to the Corps (and potential warzones) but the Marine Corps persona will not allow it...anyone who looks at him (or anyone who looks at him and knows Marines) knows that he is a Marine-a Marine without a Corps.

So a year later...

We are in Alabama and no longer NC. (Some days it is good and other days I long for NC or DC again.)

I am working at Ann Taylor Loft and wondering if I should head back to the classroom, just stay put, or try a new career altogether.

Dave is going to school. He is doing pretty well. Some days he even likes his classes. Other days he'd rather be sitting in the rain in the middle of the woods surrounded by a platoon of Marines in the middle of February.

We're living on our own again and all of our boxes have moved out of storage. I'm delaying on unpacking all of them...possibly subconsciously I am trying not to get too settled so this isn't permanent. I haven't figured out what happens if I totally unpack every box. (I've never done it in any place we have lived. Not since that first move from the farmhouse I grew up in. Commitment issues? Definitely about certain things.)

We have a few select friends we hang out with on a very irregular basis. I miss "my boys" all the time. I miss the days that I would come home from a long day/week at JCMS to find one of my boys staying with us for the weekend. Hilarity always ensued at some point during the weekend.

Sometimes I even think I miss payday weekends. (Surely someone needs to save me from the monotany of AL life if I am longing for a payday wknd in J-ville. I think I've lost my mind.)

{Gasp} I think I even miss listening to the boots in line behind me talk. Why yes I have certainly lost my mind for sure. (Not boots like you wear, boots like newbie Marines.)

In Alabama we have a whole church family that loves us, just the way we are.

In NC we had a whole USMC family that loved us the same way. (Granted they still love us...just from afar now.)

In summary, I know life always changes. Even life back in the USMC would be different than it was when we left it last June. I'm hoping we don't always look back on this day with such a mixture of emotions and sometimes even dissapointment over what could have been..."if only." I'm hoping and praying we figure out what our purpose is at this point in time and where we should be headed.

1 comment:

Peapod Four said...

Makes me want to give you a hug.
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