Turning Points & Decisions

I've been thinking a lot today about what will be happening in a few months. Dave is reaching the end of his active duty portion of his enlistment. This means we are faced with first the decision to re-enlist or not to re-enlist? Re-enlistment is an almost certainty that he will deploy at least one more time and possibly four more times. We both are not liking the deployment, but we're surviving. I don't think anyone really likes deployment though. I also know that part of my husband deep down truly loves being a Marine. His wife, deep down, enjoys and is proud to be a Marine's husband. However, I was kind of looking forward to a life not governed by the Corps. I would love to have a "normal" life, but I know that there really is no such thing as normal. The husband says he doesn't want to re-enlist, but that doesn't keep me from wondering why he doesn't want to re-enlist. Is it that he really doesn't want to be an active duty Marine any longer...or is it because his wife has been so vocal about dreading the possibilityy of another deployment? So, that's the first question...EAS (expiration of active service for those non-USMC readers) or not to EAS and why.

If the answer to the first question is not to re-enlist then we come to the next question...DC area or AL area? We both love both places, but are struggling to figure out which one would be the best for us. Ok...DC area pros...we have already lived there once and were having a great time there by the time we had to move. We both miss it like crazy and try to visit our friends there as much as we can. My dream job would be to work at the Library of Congress. Why? Deep down I want to be a librarian, I love teaching...but my fascination is really with books and those who are readers of books. If we move to the DC area I could potentially work at the LOC. We also have some connections with possible jobs for my husband. Connections to decent paying jobs at that. The drawbacks to the DC area is that it is so expensive to live there and it is far from his parents/family. We would love to live in the South (especially me who hates the cold winters) and would like to be near family. Another pro would be the probability that we both would be able to go to school there. The husband can get his bachelor's and I can get my master's. Education is a good thing. We also have some friends already there that we would have a ball hanging out with on a regular basis again. (Shout out to the Martins and the Abbotts!)

The pros to AL would be that we would be near his family (although miles from mine...) and his friends from childhood. We would also have some job connections there as well...just not so sure it is the right direction for us right now. I'm worried that we might end up getting in a rut there (if that makes any sense at all). I would love to be a resident of the south still. The warm weather, while stifling at times, is sooooo much better than the bitter cold and icy, snowy, slushy mess of northern winters. I'll take the heat any day, I despise being cold. Dave would be home close to his dad and they could do guy stuff. I know they both would love it. I think education would be harder for Dave in AL. I have no real reasons I can form into words at the moment, just a gut feeling. I think a master's for me would be harder as well there. Possibly not, but I'm just thinking it would be. I think we may put off having children a lot longer if we lived in AL as well (which doesn't make sense either, but eh...).

This is a turning point in our lives and I feel like whatever decision is made will affect us for the rest of our lives. The questions is will it affect us positively or negatively? Anyone who knows me knows I am indecisive to say the least. I can make split second decisions in emergency situations and everyday in class...but where to eat dinner, what car to buy, and what to do at this point in life...I don't like decisions like that. I also recognize that really it is a decision my husband needs to make. It will be him either being a Marine for another 4 years or living wherever. In both AL and DC we will be away from my family, no surprise there...jobs in Ohio for teachers (or librarians) don't really exist. Although in DC we would probably make some weekend trips if we could afford it. Another crazy thing for this "independent" woman to say is that he's the head of our household, God says so. I know Dave will take my thoughts and feelings into consideration, but I really feel like this is a choice he needs to be the one to make. If he doesn't and I try to make it for us...I feel like it could drive a wedge between us. Maybe not right away, but further on down the line. I suppose only time will tell what lies in store for us and out future...I'm just going to have to leave it in capable male hands for now.